this week I am...

...missing all my wonderful friends immensely, and hoping you'll all remember me when life calms down enough to start blogging again.

...inundated in homeschool prep. Completely buried.

...elated over finishing quarter one's progress report (homeschool paperwork). And a day early at that. And grateful that Rich has volunteered to deliver it to district office tomorrow.

...making numerous lists of holiday prep work to be done. So many lists.

...pleased with the few gifts I've managed to get made so far.

...annoyed that just after I finished up with all my dental work, my front tooth chipped. Pretty big, jagged chip. Boys told me it looks like "an ugly old witch's tooth"...gee, thanks guys. ;)

...missing you all so very much. Yeah, I know I said that already. But it's just oh-so-true. And has me feeling oh-so-sad.

...hoping life is treating you all wonderfully!!!!

let the whine-fest begin...

Just from the title, I'm sure you realize that it might be wise to just skip this post, right? Seriously, highly recommeded strategy.

Well, another read-a-thon has come and gone. And as much fun as it was, I now begin to pay the price for blowing off all the work I should have been doing instead. I'm not sure if I'm more exhausted from the read-a-thon and the exciting, draining, and ultimately sucky football game last night or from the thought of the week ahead. (BTW, Chris, I still sort of think that going out and celebrating by buying three books is somewhat akin to rubbing salt in my wounds! Oh hell, you know I love you anyway.)

Anyway, I may be a tad scarce this week. Which totally sucks, as I actually finished books (shocking, I know) that I could be talking about. Just going to be "one of those weeks."

Monday afternoons this semester are always a tad hectic...I have just enough time to throw together a very simple supper after picking up the boys from chess club so that Rich has enough time to eat it after arriving home from Annie's flute lesson before he has to run out the door to teach his night class. Today we also have to throw in Baker's birthday. Happy 7th birthday, Baker!

Tuesday is Gray's birthday!!!! Tomorrow, he shall be turning 9. Or so says the calendar, but I'm still somewhat in denial. Yes, that whole they grow up too fast thing rearing its ugly head. Am not ready at all, as in I haven't even wrapped his presents. Or even bought them all.

Wednesday should be fun...Annie volunteers at the library in the morning, and she'll have to just wait there and do some schoolwork when she finishes, because I will be in the dentist's chair having three more fillings replaced. Then that evening I'll be taking her back to the library for teen game night while Rich takes the boys to swimming lessons.

Thursday's pretty slow...Annie just has art class. Oops, and the boys check-ups.

Friday...if things ever get worked out, Gray will be having a friend sleep over. (They've been playing phone tag all weekend.)

And Saturday, of course, is Halloween. No, we don't have our pumpkins or candy or even all of Annie's costume. My parents are also coming to visit. We will be celebrating Gray's birthday with them. And Annie has to be at the library again, as she's helping with the Halloween party they're throwing for the little ones. And since my parents are coming, I actually need to clean, which believe me, at this point is a far bigger task than it should be...this place is currently a dump of epic proportions!

Okay, so I could deal with all of that. Not happily (I hate having so much running around to do), but I could deal and be fine. No, what has totally sent me over the edge here is the fact that I've reached the end of all the school prep I did over the summer...from here on out, it's a matter of just trying to stay one step ahead. And major #momfail this weekend. I honestly had no business blowing off all responsibilities. Because now I don't have today's EnviSci lecture/discussion plan finished, nor do I have today's history prep done. We'll get through the other subjects, and then I'll set Annie loose to just work on some of her long term assignments, but I will still be feeling incredibly guilty for dropping the ball. And I will be scrambling like hell, trying desperately to get us caught back up before this quarter ends and I have to write the damn quarterly report in a few weeks. Seriously feeling like my head's going to explode here.

So...end of bitching and complaining. Except to say that I'll be missing you this week, since I likely won't have much computer time. Have a fabulous week, everyone!!!!

snapshots of fall

I have to admit that I've had a major case of the "blahs" lately. I'm sorry...I don't mean to whine. And I hate making excuses, but that's why I haven't been a very good blogger lately. I can't seem to keep up with my blog reading at all, and I really haven't been posting much either. There's certainly nothing wrong in my life, and I've actually been quite busy. Actually maybe that's part of the problem--maybe I've been too busy. So many things to do for so many people. Not the least of which is school stuff. Sorry again. Seems like I complain about school all the time. And I shouldn't. Because I know how very lucky we are to be in a position to give Annie the education she needs and just can't get at the local public school. But it is so draining...  Anyway. I need to snap out of this funk!!!

And Susan unwittingly gave me a little boost this morning. When I read her post loaded with fall photos, I was inspired to grab my camera and head out into the yard. The funny thing is is that this is a yearly tradition with me. Every year I spend a morning taking fall photos in our yard. But it had never entered my mind this year. That's what the blahs will do to you, I guess.Anyway, thank you, Susan!

Okay, I admit I'm no photographer, but what the heck, it's never stopped me from posting pictures before. ;) Here's a look at autumn in our tiny little patch of upstate New York:

Very few flowers about now. These sedum seem to be the only thing blooming in our yard. And yes, I love flowers, but...

I actually tend to enjoy even more when they're dead.

 

 

And what's fall without changing leaves, huh?

 

 

 

And berries...

 And fruit...

Okay, I apologize for the rotting apple picture, but I thought the lady bug eating away in there was just too cool. We have an awesome pear crop this year...we've been stocking our fruit bowl for the past couple weeks and still have tons. Going to make a pear crisp today. Big baking day around here actually--need to make brownies for this week's lunches and make banana bread as we've got some bananas going to the dark side.
And :D. I was so thrilled that I caught a shot (albeit a blurry one) of a couple of stragglers. So very fall.

And speaking of fall...I'm very excited about Dewey's Read-a-Thon. And if that doesn't snap me out this funk, nothing will. :D

on my mind this morning

*Odontophobia anyone? *raising hand very high* I finally made myself make an appointment for a check-up. And I must admit I'm proud of myself for finally doing so. It's way overdue. The only problem is that I'm now having trouble sleeping and I feel like my heart is always pounding...and the damn appointment is still 2 1/2 weeks away. I am so afraid there are going to be major problems...

*I am not masochistic. Therefore, I will never watch Penn State play Iowa again. NEVER. Two years in a row of hopes shattered by them is enough. :(

*We've been trying to make this a fun weekend for Max (we don't generally do parties, but instead give them a weekend full of fun of their choosing). This, however, means I'm even further behind than usual in answering e-mails and reading blogs. But this probably won't be the day I catch up, as I've got much school work to sneak in between Maxidoodle requests.


Okay, and after all that whining, I do actually have something fun on my mind, too:

*I'm a big fat liar. Just a few days ago, I made myself a list of all the books I had to finish before starting new ones. But already I'm heading off course. See, the Stevens family has been inspired by Becky and Becky's Mom. We're going to try something similar to their challenges to one another, though we're picking out books we honestly believe the recipient will love. (We each have to have read the book we're recommending.) So Friday night, we drew names to see whom we would be picking a book for, and then yesterday while eating lunch at McDonalds (Ugh. But McDonalds playland is what Max requested.), we handed out our assignments.

--Max chose the Warriors graphic novel series Graystripe's Adventures by Erin Hunter for Annie.
--Gray chose Space Chimps: Mission to Malgor adapted by Lauren Alexander for Max.
--Annie chose Dramacon Ultimate Edition by Svetlana Chmakova for me.
--Rich chose Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone by J.K. Rowling for Gray.
--And I chose The Knife of Never Letting Go by Patrick Ness for Rich.

We've given ourselves about a month to complete our assignments. Then we're going out for pizza, where we'll discuss our reads and give out our next assignments. Maybe we'll even do fun little interviews like Becky and her mom. :D

*Also on the fun side of life, I'm finally getting back to work on the library. Doing some serious rearranging of books. Hopefully more weeding out. And Rich and I figured out a few places where we can add more shelves, and I designed something for him to build for the one area. I know...so not fair to poor Rich...I design and he builds. But believe me, it would be a disaster if we switched jobs. ;)

a hodge podge and a half

We're out of here tomorrow as soon as the boys get home from school. Going to surprise Rich's mom. So much I've been trying to get done before we go, as I know I won't get much accomplished over the weekend. One of those things is finally, finally, finally getting caught up with everyone's posts. "Caught up" just never seems to happen anymore though. But I did the best I could. Certainly has been a fun week around here, huh? Thank you Amy, for all your dedication and hard work in pulling it off...and well, for being the sweetheart that you are! And thanks to all those who helped her with BBAW as well!

*****
School is already kicking my butt, so I've had very little time for "recreational" reading this week. I'm only about halfway through The Knife of Never Letting Go. I'm hoping to be able to finish it in the car tomorrow (note to self: don't forget book light!). Seriously can't get over how much I'm loving this book. Honestly don't know if it's just me, or if it's entirely the book, or if it's some combination of the two...but this book just has my emotions in overdrive. It's so raw and powerful and compelling...and I don't even know entirely what the hell's even going on yet!

There was this paragraph that I read this morning that just hit me. One of the saddest things I've ever read in a fictional work. I found myself reading it again. And then again. Like I somehow didn't believe that something could be this sad. I'm so curious, to any of you who have read the book, did this passage hit you as well? I don't think it gives away anything about the story to share it here:

Maybe our story will turn out differently if we take the left fork, maybe the bad things that are waiting to happen to us won't happen, maybe there's happiness at the end of the left fork and warm places with the people who love us and no Noise but no silence neither and there's plenty of food and no one dies and no one dies and no one never never dies.

*****
Oh my gosh...I can't believe I almost forgot to tell you. Yes, I'm beaming with pride at myself. See, the best, and man, I do mean the very best, library sale in the county is going on this week. And I didn't go. Rich and Annie went. But not me. Any freakin' idea how hard it was to say no?!! But I did it!!!

I think the willpower involved in this book buying ban ranks right up there with the willpower it took to quit smoking all those many years ago. Oh shit...I gained almost 50 pounds in the year following quitting smoking. I gain one lousy pound and this ban is history! ;)

Sunday Salon...the ban

Okay, I know I've tried this book buying ban kind of thing before. And every time I tried, I truly had good intentions. And still I failed. But hey, that's no reason not to try again, right? And I'm hopeful, really I am. For one thing, I have a lot of inspiration this time around:

1. Nymeth's post about tackling her TBR mountain. Yeah, and I suspect I was not the only one who had a nerve struck with her post. ; ) Seriously, isn't it just easier to face a monster head on when you've got friends doing battle along with you?

2. This:
Our once lovely library. Now there are books piled on the floor and books piled on the table and books scattered through the rest of the house... I'm in the midst of trying to rearrange it a bit, and weed it out a bit. But the bottom line is that there are just too many books for the amount of shelves. It's just become overwhelming. And not nearly as fun to be in there because it's like running a gauntlet just to get to a chair. :(



3. Reading the book Affluenza. Yep, it was the final kick in the pants I really, really needed.

Now I'm not claiming that I now have a will made of iron or anything. In fact, to help ensure success, I'm starting slowly. Very slowly. And I plan on rewarding success heavily to further motivate me. My goals are to buy less. And to tame the TBR piles to levels where I don't have to feel guilty about bringing more books into this house.

So, to buy a new book, I must:

a. If they are books from my TBR pile that I plan to keep, I must read 10. Or...

b. If they are books from my TBR pile that I will then give away, I must read 5. Or...

c. If they are books from the library, I must read 8.

d. PaperbackSwap doesn't count...but I can't buy credits.

Like I said, I'm starting slowly. But I'm hoping that success will lead me to realize that it's really not as hard as I imagined. And thus I will be able to raise those numbers without it leading to failure.

If I really follow through here, I guess there will be less blame to hand out, huh? Of course, I do still have this big box of books sitting here that I brought home from vacation...some of those have blame attached when I finally get around to it.

Anyway, wish me luck...

reassessing

Whew. Finally unpacked. Caught up on the laundry. The massive pile of mail has been dealt with. Menu made, and groceries stockpiled for the week. Even managed to knock out the shopping for the boys' mile-long list of required school supplies. But I just can't seem to defeat google reader. *sigh*

So, in keeping with my newly formed list of goals (#2), I'm clicking the mark-as-read button.

Now I realize that many say that goals should be specific and measurable. And I do understand how that can make it easier to see one's progress. So maybe I shouldn't actually call these goals. More of a new way to approach life.

#1--Create more.

#2--Stress less.

#3--Cook more. And cook healthier.

#4--Spend less. And spend more wisely.

#5--Be more accepting of who I am.

#6--Take risks.

#7--Live a varied life.

Yes, our trip invigorated me. Can you tell? :D And the start of a new season helps, too...sort of like the feeling of starting a new year.

Damn, I love the feeling of optimism!